Starting a family can be one of the biggest decisions you’ll ever make—and for LGBTQ+ people, it can sometimes feel like there are more questions than answers. You might have heard things from friends, seen something online, or just felt unsure about where you stand when it comes to treatment options, legal rights, or cost.
We hear these worries all the time. If you're wondering what’s fact and what’s fiction when it comes to LGBTQ+ fertility care—this blog is for you.
Accessing care and getting started
Myth: Fertility treatment for LGBTQ+ couples is difficult to access.
Fact: It shouldn’t be—and at Care Fertility, it isn’t. All patients, regardless of gender or sexual orientation, are welcomed with the same personalised approach and expert care. Whether you’re planning for the future or ready to begin now, we’ll guide you every step of the way.
Interestingly, patients in same-sex female couples, gender-diverse partnerships, and single individuals are less likely to speak to their GP before starting treatment (around 45-48%) compared to opposite-sex couples (85%), according to the Human Fertilisation and Embryology Authority (HFEA). That’s why having a clear, welcoming place to start, matters.
Learn more: Care Fertility LGBTQ+ Pathways
Your treatment, your way
Myth: There’s only one fertility treatment for same-sex couples.
Fact: There’s no one-size-fits-all. Depending on your goals and medical background, your path might involve intrauterine insemination (IUI), IVF using donor sperm or eggs, reciprocal IVF (shared motherhood), or surrogacy. We build your treatment around you—never the other way around.
Myth: Only one partner can be biologically involved.
Fact: Not true. In reciprocal IVF (shared motherhood), one partner provides the eggs and the other carries the pregnancy—so both can be part of the biological and emotional journey.
Myth: Only the birth mum is recognised legally.
Fact: Not true. In the UK, both partners can be named on the birth certificate when you’ve had fertility treatment at a licensed clinic like Care Fertility and have signed the correct consent forms through Engaged MD. It’s legally sound—and we make sure everything’s completed properly, so both parents are fully protected.
Myth: You need to be married or in a civil partnership.
Fact: Love is love. Parenthood isn’t exclusive to one type of relationship. You don’t need to be married to start your fertility journey—what matters most is that you’re ready to take that step, and we're here when you're ready.
Explore: Care Fertility IVF Treatments
Understanding surrogacy in the UK
Myth: Surrogacy for couples is complex and risky in the UK.
Fact: Surrogacy is legal and well-regulated in the UK, especially when handled through licensed clinics. At Care Fertility, we support intended fathers with egg donor selection, embryo creation, and coordination with your chosen surrogate. It’s a structured process—with expert teams by your side.
Myth: Surrogacy is expensive because you have to pay someone to be your surrogate.
Fact: In the UK, surrogacy is altruistic by law. That means surrogates can’t be paid for carrying a pregnancy—only for reasonable expenses like travel, maternity clothing, or time off work. So while there are still costs involved (egg donation, IVF, legal advice), you’re not paying someone to be pregnant. It’s a shared journey, built on trust, clarity, and care—with expert teams to support every step.
“Surrogacy is a remarkable way to create your family, bringing together hope, compassion, and shared purpose. The surrogacy journey can feel overwhelming at the start, but at Care Fertility, we've been building families through surrogacy for years and we have everything you need to reach your goals of parenthood.”
Myth: You need to go abroad for surrogacy.
Fact: UK surrogacy is fully legal and increasingly accessible. At Care Fertility, we offer dedicated support for men, including egg donor matching, embryo creation, and coordination with your surrogate and legal team. You can build your family close to home—with expert care at every stage.
Learn more about Care Fertility's Surrogacy support
Biology, identity, and inclusivity
Myth: Fertility treatment is more complex for LGBTQ+ patients
Truth: It doesn’t have to be. Fertility care should feel empowering—not overwhelming. And thanks to advances in reproductive technology, there are now more paths to parenthood than ever before, no matter your gender identity or sexual orientation.
Same-sex female couples might explore IVF with donor sperm, or shared motherhood (reciprocal IVF). Male couples may consider IVF using an egg donor and a surrogate. And for trans and non-binary patients, fertility preservation is often possible before starting hormone therapy or surgery.
Myth: LGBTQ+ patients cannot have biological children
Fact: It’s absolutely possible. There are many ways LGBTQ+ people can have a biological connection to their child.
For lesbian couples, one partner can use her own eggs with donor sperm. Or, through shared motherhood, one provides the eggs and the other carries the pregnancy—so both are involved, biologically and emotionally.
Gay male couples can become parents through egg donation and surrogacy. Trans men may be able to use their own eggs, and trans women might use stored sperm—depending on personal medical history and whether gametes were preserved before transitioning.
We’re here to explore every option with you—safely, clearly, and compassionately.
Myth: LGBTQ+ patients don't experience infertility
Fact: Infertility doesn’t discriminate. LGBTQ+ patients can face medical infertility due to conditions like polycystic ovary syndrome (PCOS), endometriosis, low sperm count, or age-related factors—just like heterosexual patients. Transition-related treatments can also impact fertility, which is why planning ahead matters.
Myth: Surrogates prefer to work with heterosexual couples
Fact: Actually, the opposite may be true—up to two-thirds of UK surrogacy cycles are for same-sex couples, according to the HFEA. Many surrogates are motivated by the shared purpose of helping someone become a parent, no matter their identity.
Actually, the opposite may be true. According to the Human Fertilisation and Embryology Authority (HFEA), around two-thirds of UK surrogacy arrangements support same-sex couples. Many surrogates are driven by a shared sense of purpose—to help someone build their family, no matter their background, relationship, or identity.
“We often hear from LGBTQ+ patients that they didn’t realise surrogacy was an option for them. It’s one of the most common barriers to starting treatment. But once people learn just how many surrogacy journeys begin with same-sex couples, they start to feel more hopeful—and rightly so.
Your fertility provider can help guide you through the complexities of surrogacy with compassion and expertise, ensuring you feel supported at every step.”
— Dr Alison Richardson, Consultant in Reproductive Medicine & Deputy Group Medical Director at Care Fertility
Myth: Children of LGBTQ+ parents will face social stigma
Truth: The evidence tells a different story. Decades of research show that children raised by LGBTQ+ parents thrive just as well as those with heterosexual parents. They’re just as emotionally secure, socially connected, and supported in their development.
There’s no link between a parent’s sexual orientation or gender identity and a child’s wellbeing. What matters most is a safe, loving home—and LGBTQ+ families provide exactly that.
At Care Fertility, we’re proud to support diverse families. We’ll stand with you on your journey to parenthood, making sure you feel seen, respected, and backed by expert care.
The bigger picture: funding, legalities, and support
Myth: NHS funding is only for heterosexual couples.
Fact: Access to NHS-funded fertility treatment can vary depending on your local Integrated Care Board (ICB). While it’s not always equal, we’re happy to help explain your options and support you in understanding what’s available both privately and through the NHS.
Check your eligibility using our NHS funding calculator
Myth: You have to go abroad for LGBTQ+ fertility care.
Truth: The UK has world-leading fertility clinics, and many—including Care Fertility—specialise in LGBTQ+ pathways like reciprocal IVF, donor conception, and surrogacy. You can build your family right here with expert support and legal protections under UK law.
Myth: LGBTQ+ fertility care is always unaffordable.
Truth: Fertility treatment is a big investment for anyone, but there are funding options available—from NHS support to treatment packages, sperm sharing, and payment plans. Our team can talk you through everything, so you can plan with confidence.
Myth: LGBTQ+ couples can’t do IVF in the UK without going through lengthy legal hoops.
Fact: UK law protects and supports same-sex couples through the fertility process. Clinics like Care Fertility use detailed consent forms to establish legal parenthood clearly and safely—so treatment isn’t delayed by paperwork, and you can focus on building your family.
Read: Care Fertility Funding & Costs
Inclusive care for trans and non-binary people
Myth: Fertility clinics still don’t cater for trans or non-binary people.
Truth: While some barriers do still exist, at Care Fertility we are building inclusive, gender-affirming care pathways. That includes tailored fertility preservation, sensitive consent processes, and clinical teams trained to support all identities.
Myth: Gender-affirming hormones make fertility care impossible.
Fact: Many trans and non-binary people can preserve fertility before or even during gender-affirming treatment. It’s all about timing and planning.
For example, testosterone may suppress ovulation, but it doesn’t always stop egg development. With careful stimulation, it’s still possible to collect eggs. There are options tailored to your needs, so you never have to choose between affirming your identity and planning for the future.
“A fertility specialist can guide you through the available options and help you make informed decisions—so you don’t have to choose between your identity and your hopes of building a family. Whatever stage you’re at, you deserve care that’s clear, respectful, and completely centred on you.”
- Dr Victoria Sephton, Chief Medical Officer at Care Fertility
Myth: Trans and NB People can’t have biological children
Fact: Your path may look different—but it’s absolutely possible. Whether you’re planning solo parenthood, co-parenting with a partner, or using donor sperm or eggs, we’ll guide you through the options that best align with your goals. You’re not starting from scratch—you’re starting with support.
Discover: Care Fertility Trans & NB Support
Donor conception and community support
Myth: Only heterosexual people can donate sperm and eggs
Fact: LGBTQ+ people can and do donate. There are no legal restrictions against LGBTQ+ individuals donating in the UK, providing they meet health and screening criteria.
Myth: There is no support for donor conceived children
Fact: There’s a strong support network in place—and we’re proud to be part of it.
Families created through donor conception don’t have to navigate the journey alone. There are fantastic charities offering tailored support, and one of the most trusted is the Donor Conception Network—a charity that’s been supporting donor-conceived people and their families for over 30 years.
We’re proud to partner with the Donor Conception Network to make sure our patients—and their children—have access to expert guidance, resources, and community. From understanding how and when to talk about donor conception, to connecting with others on similar paths, the support is there when you need it.
Myth: There is a shortage of donor egg and sperm for LGBTQ+ families
Fact: True, but the shortage isn’t just for LGBTQ+ families—it affects everyone. There’s a national shortage of egg and sperm donors across the UK, and as more people—LGBTQ+ and straight alike—turn to donor conception to grow their families, the need is greater than ever.
At Care Fertility, LGBTQ+ individuals and couples have full access to our national donor programme. But to meet growing demand, we need more people to consider donating—especially those from diverse ethnic backgrounds and the LGBTQ+ community, who often want donors they can relate to.
If you’ve ever thought about donating, now’s the time. Your decision could change someone’s life—and help make family possible for everyone.
Myth: More same sex couple donate than heterosexual couples.
Fact: False—same-sex couples are actually more likely to donate. According to the Human Fertilisation and Embryology Authority (HFEA), 41% of same-sex couples go on to donate eggs or sperm—compared to 37% of opposite-sex couples.
That means LGBTQ+ families aren’t just growing their own—they’re helping others do the same. It’s a powerful reminder that our community plays a vital role in creating families of all kinds.
Myth: Sperm Sharing saves you money on your fertility costs
Fact: True, and it helps someone else grow their family too. If you're part of a same-sex male couple, sperm sharing means one of you donates sperm to help another person or couple have a baby. In return, you receive up to £3,000 off your own IVF treatment.
It’s a meaningful way to make your journey to parenthood more affordable—while giving someone else the chance to start theirs.
More info: Care Fertility Donor Programmes
You’re not starting from scratch—you’re starting with support
At Care Fertility, we’ve been helping LGBTQ+ people build their families for decades. Whether you're at the very beginning or ready to move forward, you’ll find clear guidance, expert care, and a team who truly listens.
If you’re thinking about starting a family, have questions about your options, or just need a safe space to talk things through—we’re here.
Get in touch with our team today to take the next step towards growing your family, your way.
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