Ask 10 people how they became parents and you'll get 10 different answers. Some conceived without any help at all. Others needed a scan, a blood test, or a diagnosis before anyone could tell them what came next. Some built their family with a partner sitting beside them at every appointment, and some built it alone, on their own terms, in their own time.
At Care Fertility, we see the full range of it. There's no single route through fertility treatment, and there's certainly no single type of person who ends up needing it. Whether you're part of a couple, single by choice or by circumstance, in a same-sex relationship or a heterosexual one, using your own eggs and sperm or a donor's, the path is yours to shape.
Starting with a conversation, not a form
However you're building your family, the process with us starts the same way: with a phone call to our patient enquiry team. We know it can feel like a big step to pick up the phone, particularly if you're not sure yet what you need or whether you even qualify for help. That first conversation isn't a commitment to treatment. It's simply how we get to know your situation and book in the fertility tests that make sense for you.
Those tests come before you see a doctor, not after. It means that when you do sit down for your consultation, your doctor already has your results in front of them and can talk through your options there and then, rather than sending you away to wait for a letter. From there, you'll receive a summary of your treatment options and estimated costs through our treatment companion app, Salve, so you have something to refer back to when you're weighing things up at home.
The many shapes a family can take
For some, that route is straightforward IVF or IUI using your own eggs and sperm. For others, donor eggs, donor sperm or donor embryos open up a path that wouldn't otherwise exist, whether that's because of a medical diagnosis, because you're single, or because you and your partner need a donor to conceive. Same-sex female couples often explore shared motherhood, sometimes known as reciprocal IVF, where one partner provides the eggs and the other carries the pregnancy. Same-sex male couples, single men, and heterosexual couples who can’t carry a pregnancy may look at surrogacy, working with a surrogate to bring their family into being. Some people freeze their eggs, sperm or embryos years before they're ready to use them, buying themselves time rather than making a decision now.
None of these paths is a fallback option or a consolation prize. They're simply different ways of getting to the same place: a family that's yours.
If you're single, whether by choice or because things haven't worked out the way you'd planned, that's a valid starting point too. Solo parenthood using donor sperm or donor eggs is one of the fastest-growing reasons people contact us, and there's no requirement to explain or justify that choice when you call. The same tests, the same consultation process, and the same care apply, just without a second name on the file.
For patients considering surrogacy, whether that’s because of a medical condition that makes carrying a pregnancy unsafe, because you’re in a same-sex male relationship, because you’re a single man hoping to become a father, or because you’re part of a heterosexual couple who can’t carry a pregnancy, the process looks a little different again. We offer both host and straight surrogacy. With host (or gestational) surrogacy, your surrogate carries an embryo created using the intended mother’s own egg or a donor egg, so she has no genetic link to the baby. With straight (or traditional) surrogacy, the embryo is created using the surrogate’s own egg. Surrogacy in the UK comes with its own legal considerations, and we’ll always talk you through what that means practically, alongside the clinical side of things.
What stays the same, whatever you choose
Wherever your path leads, the clinical process around it stays consistent. Once your consultation is done and your treatment plan is agreed, you'll complete screening blood tests and consent forms through EngagedMD before your treatment planning meeting with one of our nurses, where you'll go through the practical detail together, including medication. Your medication is then supplied by Stork, ready for when you need it. It's a lot of steps, we know, but each one is there so that nothing about your care is left to guesswork, for you or for us.
We'd also gently say this: you don't have to have it all figured out before you call. Plenty of people ring us with more questions than answers, wanting to understand what's realistic for their situation before they decide on anything. That's a perfectly good reason to get in touch.
Fertility options if you're transgender or non-binary
If you're trans or non-binary, family building might start well before you're thinking about a baby at all. If you're considering hormone therapy or gender-affirming surgery, it's worth looking at fertility preservation first, since both can affect your fertility afterwards. We offer tailored preservation for trans men, trans women and non-binary people, whether that's sperm freezing (usually one or two visits) or egg freezing, so the decision about whether to have children later stays open, on your terms and your timeline. Donor sperm treatment is also available for trans men and non-binary patients who retain a uterus and want to carry a pregnancy themselves.
Support that goes beyond the clinical appointments
Whichever path applies to you, we don't think the support around treatment should stop at the clinic door. Fertility counselling is built into care for every patient, not reserved for when things go wrong, and it's there for LGBTQ+ patients, single patients, and anyone navigating family building outside the traditional two-parent, own-gametes route just as much as anyone else. We also point patients towards wider peer support, including The Fertility Alliance, for the parts of this that are easier to talk through with people who've been there themselves rather than with us alone. For the parts of this that are easier to talk through with people who've been there themselves rather than with us alone.
However you build it, it's still a family
If there's one thing worth taking from all this, it's that "trying to conceive" doesn't look the same for everyone, and it was never going to. Some of our patients arrive already certain of their route. Others need a consultation, or two, to work out what fits. Both are fine starting points.
It's also worth saying that working out which path is right for you doesn't have to happen alone, even if you're going into treatment as a single patient. Our clinical teams see this range of circumstances every week, and fertility counselling is available to anyone who wants to talk through the decision itself, not just the treatment that follows it. There's no expectation that you'll have made your mind up before you speak to us; for a lot of patients, that clarity comes later, once they understand what's actually involved.
If you'd like to talk through what might be right for you, our patient enquiry team is happy to have that conversation whenever you're ready, with no assumptions made about who you are, who you love, or how you'd like to become a parent.
